Retouching The Retouched

The below picture was on Yahoo!'s homepage a few days ago. Michael 's face and the word "Bad" both seem to be brightened a bit as compared to the original album cover so some photo retoucher was hard at work, it's just unfortunate that they forgot to clean up that crackhead's thumb nail.

And yes, it is ironic that even after all of Michael's real life facial "touch-ups" the media still feels the need to do their own tinkering. The lesson here? "You're gonna be the only you that there is or was, so be you, please oh please, be yourself." -TG

-a.

Potatoes Galore

As we’ve mentioned many times before, this is our first dip into the gardening pool. We’ve learned a lot thus far and have been surprised by many things but nothing prepared us for the vigor of the small, dirty starch balls we call potatoes. They grow like mad! Our garden rows are packed and our build-as-they-go container is even more so. We literally could not dig up enough dirt to keep up with them. We had to give up and just let them go. This is the picture we posted before of the container right when the taters started to sprout:



And this is how far we got in building up the sides of the container before the potatoes got out of control:



Some of the plants are blooming which means there are potatoes down below. We got a little shovel-happy and decided to dig up one of our Yukon Gold plants, below was the yield:







Needless to say, they were so, so good. For the rest of potato plants we’re going to let them bloom and start to die a little before we harvest them so the potatoes can continue to grow and it'll allow some time for their skin to toughen up a bit as well.

-a.

Generation Gap

I’m 28 years old and Crystal’s brother is about to be 23. Five years doesn’t seem like that much, but there’s a definite generation gap.

For example, one time he asked Crystal what websites she used to go to when she was little. Websites? Our computer use was limited to heavily pixelated games, banners that we’d print out on a dot matrix printer and then color in, or maybe if we were feeling studious, some Mavis Beacon typing exercises. We didn’t have this Internet thing.

Another example: One time we were watching TV and a Ford commercial came on with Journey’s “Any Way You Want It” featured in it. He turned to me and said, “Can you imagine these studio musicians totally getting into this song when they were recording it for this commercial.” I said, “What! This is f*#@ing Journey, man!” He simply didn’t know. The name Steve Perry means nothing to him. It’s a shame.

And lastly, his generation loves sour candy.

-a.

Rock With You

Three cheers for the King of Pop. You will be missed.

-c+a

Lettuces

Out of all the things I wanted in the garden, lettuces were right near the top of the list, which went: potatoes, lettuces, corn. See, I told you it was near the top. And I’m happy to report that our little leafy greens are flourishing. They’re to the point where I think we totally overdid it. Note for next year: A full row of arugula is way too much. I think we were arugula-deprived heading into spring so we overcompensated, and then some. But, there are worse things than having too much arugula, like having no arugula.

All the varieties we planted (Swiss Chard, Green Oakleaf, Lolla Rossa, arugula, Red Romaine, Tango, Gold Rush, spinach, kale and some all-inclusive mesclun mix) are up and producing wonderfully. There’s nothing like picking fresh, fragrant salad greens minutes before a meal.







Below is a picture of our first salad bounty. These are just the thinnings.



It's nutty to look at the above pictures because they were taken a little while ago and the lettuces are so much fuller now:









-a.

A New Table From Old Things

Ever since we cleaned out our barn for use as a woodshop we’ve (Crystal, Crystal’s bro Tomas J., and I) have been collecting “stuff” that we feel could be used for something in the future. I’m always happy when I actually get to use this “stuff.” It makes me feel like I’m breathing new life into something, and I'm not just a hoarder. Over the past few weeks I’ve been working on a little outdoor coffee table of sorts for my parents that utilized some of what we've collected. My folks have a seating area on their porch and needed a table to accompany a bench my Mama recently painted. So I scoured the barn and put a table together with materials that all had former lives at one time.



1-2) For the frame I used an old rusty, musty thing we found in Crystal’s parents’ backyard. After some of my elbow grease removed and sealed the metal from future rust it turned out pretty good.
3) The majority of the tabletop was this piece of wood. I’m assuming it’s pine. When in doubt, just say it’s pine. This picture is of a leftover section.
4) The board in image 3 wasn’t quite wide enough so Tomas J. and I cut it in half and added a strip from a scrap piece of 4x4 in the middle. Again, the pictured piece was leftover from one of the ends I cut off. To finish the top I put end caps on each end to hide the ugly end grain. (The word "end" made up 17.6% of that sentence.)

Below is the finished product.









-a.

Summer Games

We have two new additions to our yard for the summer!



Andrew set up a horseshoe pit (which is fun, but totally dangerous). The stakes are distanced 40 feet apart and set in the center of 4' x 4' patch of dirt. Most people use sand to absorb the impact of the horseshoe, but we make do with what we have. There are a whole set of rules that I have yet to memorize, but you can check here for further details.



The other game I call the Ring Game, though I'm not sure if this is the real name. I did a tiny bit of research and some places call it the "Bimini Ring Game" and others call it "Ringing the Bull" and the basic idea is to swing a ring attached to a string and try to get it on a hook attached to a wall or in our case, a tree. Andrew learned about the game from his Mom who saw it being played in Florida while on vacation. The versions I've seen online have fancy plaques but we went the simplified route. It's surprisingly fun and frustrating.



–c.

Two Types of People, Part II

In response to my post on the adaptiveness, hilarity and absurdity of the "There are two types of people in the world" sayings we received the following contributions from readers:

There are two types of people in the world, those who think the world is simplistic enough to subdivide into two kinds of people, and those who don't. (I feel like this may be true. There are sad, stupid people in group one.)

There are three types of people in the world, those who can count, and those who can't. (Hilarious)

There are two types of people in the world, us, and the terrorists. (Hilarious II)

-a.

Sad Day

A couple months ago Andrew and I went for a walk in the fields behind our house. Just across the creek that runs about 100 feet beyond our fence, there was a large Black Walnut tree that I noticed was leaning precariously.



A few weeks ago it fell! Andrew's dad and brother have an office right next to our house and his brother heard it fall but wasn't sure at the time what it was he was hearing. Just a loud cracking, crashing sound.




I know things like this happen all the time, but for some reason it makes me sad. Ever since it fell there has been a ton of bird activity around it. I'm not sure why.



–c.

Regina Spektor

[Image via Wikipedia]

I just listened to Regina Spektor's new album Far in its entirety on NPR and I think it's lovely and wonderful and really really amazing. I've been a fan of Regina for awhile and am fortunate to have seen her when she was playing a tiny stage in the back room of The Sidewalk Cafe in the East Village. That's when I fell in love with her music.

Not that she isn't still amazing on the big stage. I was worried when her first major label debut Begin to Hope came out because I was used to hearing just her and a piano and, for me, that was enough. I was worried that heavy production would drown out the quirkiness and personality of her songs and singing style, but I ended up really liking the album. But still, when I want to hear her like I remember her years ago at the open mic at Sidewalk I throw on Songs or Soviet Kitsch. It seems that Far is a nod to those day, a lot of piano and prominent vocals which may be why I like it so much.

Plus, it has "Dance Anthem of the 80s". You can't beat that.

–c.

Easy Like Sunday Morning

Good lighting always puts me in a good mood.

–c.

Peonies

Our peonies began blooming a few weeks ago.




Lucky for us, we got a couple before they were all gone.

–c.

One Year

Thanks to everyone who helped make our one-year anniversary even more special!

-c+a

Attack Bird Chronicles

If you haven't heard of Swoops, you should check out this site.
This Bird is Pissed.


My brother TJ took the above screengrab from a video of an attack. The dude in the foreground is laughing at another dude that just got dive bombed. Little does he know, he's next.

Watch the video below.



oh! p.s. in response to Andrew's last post, I must not be civilized. Someone must have eaten my yogurt yesterday :P
–c.

There are two types of people in the world …

I think this saying is one of my favorites. I tend to say them to myself quite often. Just today I realized that I said two of them, which prompted this post. They were:

There are two types of people in the world, people who love the unusually long intro to The Cure’s “The Kiss,” and people who don’t. (For the record, I love it.)

There are two types of people in the world, people who completely tear off and throw away the protective tin foil cover under the lid on things such as yogurt and ricotta cheese, and people who simply peel it back and put the plastic lid back over it when they’re done. (For the record, I tear it off and throw it away, like civilized people do.)

–a.

Information Graphics

(Click here for larger version)


(Click here for larger version)

[Graphics via GOOD Magazine]

If you are like me and a total sucker for info graphics maybe you've already checked out GOOD Magazine's Transparency, "graphical explorations of the data that surrounds us." Holy fantastic-ness. If you have many minutes to immerse yourself, please do click here.

–c.

Transplants

Last weekend we transplanted all our starts into the ground. We're now crossing our fingers that they make it!



Here they are hardening off on the porch before going into the ground. Wish them luck!

–c.

Potatoes

They're growing! Here are the ones in the main garden plot.



And the ones in the separate plot that wouldn't fit into the main garden. They are even bigger than this now. It's nuts how fast these are growing!





–c.

Fire Lord

[Dragon by Jessica Peffer via Neon Dragon Art]

Dragons

Andrew and I were asked to make a logo for a disc golf tournament that will be taking place in Medina this summer. The course is Roscoe Ewing and is actually one of the first disc golf courses in the country and the first one in Ohio.

The organizers wanted a dragon to be a main part of the logo. A dragon perched on top of a disc golf basket to be specific, an item of which you may or may not be familiar with. The tournament is called Roscoe's Revenge and here is the logo we came up with:



In our research we found some pretty crazy dragon art (as you can imagine). One of my favorites was a site we found called Neon Dragon Art that features the work of artist Jessica Peffer. I don't think anyone can truly appreciate dragons until they've actually attempted to draw one. Seriously, try to draw one. I dare you.

–c.

UP

On Sunday we saw the new Disney/Pixar film UP in 3D. I cried. Multiple times. UP was both funny and extremely sad. After the first 15 minutes Andrew whispered to me "This is the worst movie ever," while I cried big tears behind my 3D faux Ray-Bans. But all in all, it did not disappoint. The story was delightfully strange and the 3D was better than I expected.

Both Andrew and I enjoyed it a lot, but we also agreed that we liked Wall-E better. I hate to even compare the two because they were both so good. But I think the humor in Wall-E was more on point and in general I liked the characters in Wall-E better. But both are definitely worth watching.

–c.

NPR: Poet on Call

On my drive home from work on yesterday I heard on NPR's All Things Considered Andrei Codrescu read "Pondering Google, Facebook and Wasting Time." I listened to it again today with Andrew and my brother. It made us laugh.

"My regular e-mail now tells me I have Facebook messages, forcing me to go to Facebook, which is slow on account of the jillion egos battling for verbal-audio-visual attention."

Listen to it here. (I would put the soundclip here, but I haven't figured out a way to embed NPR audio clips. If anyone knows, please share!)

Andrei Codrescu is the founder of Exquisite Corpse.

–c.

yhs: Fruits & Vegetables - Fencing

The fencing around the garden has taken many shapes in our heads. Initially we wanted to put up chicken wire (or as some call it, “poultry netting,” which does seem a bit more politically correct) around the bottom of the existing fence that encloses the pasture. But then that seemed insecure so we figured we’d better fence closer to the actual garden. Luckily, and fittingly, our pole barn had just enough metal fence poles laying around for us to use.

We went back and forth on what kind of fencing to choose. Apparently we’re vain because from the get-to we knew we didn’t want to use plastic fencing because it would have looked ugly. There was no other reasoning than that.



Ultimately we ended up getting 200' of 48" tall chicken wire. Then we put a call out for old wire hangers and managed to gather more than we’d ever like to see again. (Handling hundreds of wire hangers is the most frustrating puzzle of snags and tangles ever.) We cut the two curved ends off of them and used those to “tack” down the bottom of the fence to keep out our little rabbit/groundhog/raccoon/skunk friends.

I also built a wooden cover that’s attached to the garden gate. It slides up and down when you come and go to cover the sizable gaps between the gate and fence that the critters could have squeezed through. So with those little nuisances taken care of we turned our attention to those cute, damn deer.

Deer don’t like many things, but even if they don’t like it, they’ll get used to it. So if you deter them with a scent or movement or noise, it will initially work, but they’ll get hip to it and you’ll have to change your method. The only thing that will work for good is a really tall fence. And by really tall we mean 12 feet. Think about that; it’s nuts! Next time you’re on a basketball court look up at the rim, then add two feet to that and that’s how tall the ding-dang fence would have to be. Now again, think about that! I’m 6'3" and a deer could clear me by over four feet. Nature!

As mentioned before, we went with the 48" tall chicken wire, so we’re planning on using different tactics throughout the summer to deter them. For example, horrible, terrible, horrible smelling spray, maybe some thoughtfully placed fishing line, wind chimes, or who knows, we may end up booby-trapping the fields. We did add stakes to the top of each pole and strung some white rope through them — which raised the total height to about 6'6" — to hopefully make the deer think twice, or at least one and a half times.



So far we’ve had no burglars, but we can feel the deer closing in. They’ve been sleeping closer and closer in the fields and I know they’re scheming. Those little devils.

–a.